The new medicine regime has been working and I have been able to think again-clearly think. Hope was being restored again. I had told Bill I was going to sell off all of my equipment in the studio because I was never going to be able to do it ever again. It has been a 4 month fog not to mention the physical problems. But with the reduction of the chronic migraine pain, reason was returning again and so was the inner spark of my personality!
And then when I awakened yesterday, I was slammed with a full on severe migraine! I lose my vision in my right eye for about 1/2 hr to 45 mins and when the vision returns, so the pain begins-imagine an ice pick behind your eye! I added more migraine meds to two I am already taking and stayed in bed! As the pain receded a bit in the late afternoon, I got up and cut out the fabric; I was grateful the brain fog had not returned, just the pain. And just before dinner, my vision turned to sparkles, signaling round two. It was hard to fight off disappointment!
This morning, I just feel a bit fuzzy and near tears (the usual migraine hangover symptoms) but I am able to follow thoughts still so I didn't lose too much ground!
I have struggled these last months on every level of my being--can you imagine stopping all of the things you do--all of our crafting-knitting, sewing, quilting, spinning, painting, wood turning, not to mention running of your household, caring for pets, driving yourself places, teaching at church and traveling ?!!!
I had to ask who am I? Am I only defined by what I do? I am afraid I have placed way too much importance upon that foundation. It has been a long road of ups and downs. I hope these last two migraines are the final bookends to this adventure!
Devastating. Sending you strength.
ReplyDeleteReally sorry to hear you are having such a terrible time with migraines and other health issues. Ongoing pain like that can definitely take a toll. I had to look back through some older posts to understand exactly what is going on. I didn't even know it was possible to have too much iron in your blood. Usually you hear about ways to eat to absorb more iron. I sure hope the medical team can figure out how to give you the relief you need and back to better health. Take care of yourself.
ReplyDeleteOh no Cindy! I'm so very sorry. Those migraines are awful. I get the same exact ones sometimes, thankfully not very often. I lose vision in both eyes after a kaliedescope type flickering. Then after a few minutes the vision returns but oh my gosh, the pain. You definitely have my love and sympathy.
ReplyDeleteBUT, and it's a big but, you still can think clearly. God has you in His hands and knows the great big picture. I'm so glad you didn't sell your things because you WILL get back to them. Sometimes we have a lesson to learn. I hope I learned mine when I had my stroke and could do nothing. I had to learn that I was still valuable as a person and to God and my family. Even if I couldn't care for our little kids at the time, clean, cook or crochet. I spent a lot of time in prayer and realizing that things didn't revolve around me, but around Him. I know He wants you to be healthy and whole again. I'm praying for you throughout the day, every day.
Blessings and love,
Betsy
I am so sorry to hear things are not working out with the migraines. I have only ever had 2 in my entire life and I can not imagine having them non stop. I will continue to pray for relief and a return to the life you desire to lead. May God give you peace.
ReplyDeleteSending hugs! There are going to be bumps in the road but I'm positive you will make it through the other side.
ReplyDeleteHope that nasty migraine has been kicked to the street (or further). Take care!
ReplyDeleteOh how I feel for you. Those ice picks are NOT FUN!!! I am glad that the meds seem to be working and hoping this was just a tiny set back. Hugs!!!!
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